While you may believe that attraction is all about physical appearance, the truth is, women won’t be attracted to you (even if you have abs of steel) if you don’t employ the art of being attractive. What do we mean? To discover the secret to appeal and how to approach women, read these truths about attraction
Body Language Matters
You’re heard it before and we’re here to tell you it again: a first impression will make or break you. In fact, according to some studies, you only have 7 seconds to make a great first impression—that’s how long it takes for a woman to size you up. However, looking the part doesn’t just mean your set physical features; rather, body language can make you more approachable, more like able, and more attractive in a mere matter of moments.
Whenever you’re approaching or speaking with a woman, straighten your posture, put a smile on your face, make eye contact, keep your torso open, put your hands where they can be seen, tilt your head to the side a bit, raise your eyebrows when something interesting is said, and lean in slightly. In fact, even shaking hands can be a great display of body language, and one of confidence as well. Furthermore, pay attention to what’s happening, and respond appropriately with your body – nod when the conversation warrants it, use hand gestures if necessary, and laugh.
Know How to Attract with Your Words
If you’re wondering how to be attractive to women, know that attraction isn’t just about body language – if only it were that simple. When it comes to the psychology of attraction, everyone wants to be with someone who makes them feel good, or turns them on emotionally. In fact, leading psychologist John Dewey has stated that there’s one thing that’s universally desired among all people: to feel important.
As such, if you want to attract a woman, you need to make her feel important. The three easiest ways to make a woman feel important are to ask questions her, dig for specifics, and act engaged – no cell phone checking, don’t look at another girl, and your drink can wait to be refilled.
Familiarize Yourself with Turnoffs
Body and verbal language are the two biggest aspects of successfully attracting women. But, perhaps equally important is knowing the things that don’t attract women, and then avoiding those things. Big turn offs for women when having a conversation with a man include having the man be overly intoxicated, overly (and obviously) interested in sex, talking about ex’s, not holding eye contact, acting distracted or uninterested, having bad hygiene, being too giddy, and talking too much or bragging.
While approaching and attracting women can be nerve wracking, you can at least approach the situation with luck on your side by cleaning up a bit (a fresh shirt wouldn’t kill you, would it?), keeping it to under a couple drinks (no one likes talking to a drunk), and acting casually. Shake her hand, ask her name, ask what brings her out tonight, mention a fact about what you’re doing there, etc. Light, friendly conversation is the best way to start.
Keep Your Confidence Levels High
Finally, to be attractive, you’ve got to be confident. If you’re not, a woman will see right through it, and immediately be turned off. Smile, hold yourself up right, push your shoulders out (in a natural way), and keep your tone of voice calm and steady. If you do, you’ll have no problem attracting women.